The One Thing I Want For Xmas
by Xiaolang's Ying Fa
Summary: (Was Kurisumasu) When Jounouchi is abandoned by all his friends and the one person he thought he could love, he slips into depession and begins to destory himself. How far is he willing to go to get away? And what if he runs into an old friend on the way?
1. Getting Away

Xiaolang's Ying Fa: I'm back!!! Konnichiwa!! Introducing…*fake drumroll* Sakari's and Hikari's Christmas Fic!! *fake audience cheering* Yay! Now this fic was supposed to be really deep and filled with angst…I dunno what happened…Erm…Oh well! It's still worth reading because it's a KAIJOU!! We LOVE Kaijou! YAY! So, no delay! Onto the goods!

Disclaimer: We do not own the characters on Yuugi-ou even though we'd like to…We do however own our characters Hikari Warui and Sakari Setsuya. 

I will mark when we switch authors ok? Like this: ** every time you see those know its switching authors. Xiaolang's Ying Fa starts out first!

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~*~Jounouchi's POV~*~

Hm…It's been a while since I've been able to enjoy the small things like this…I sigh as I slip into the steaming hot water in the bathtub. It's hot and scorching my skin a bright red. I acknowledge the pain I am supposed to feel…but I don't. My pain is my sanctuary. My temple…my haven. It's the only way to get away…I sigh again as I draw a long thin line across the flesh of my arm with the razor I had picked up. The blood oozes out and down my hand as I hold it away from the water. It drips from my finger tips and falls onto the cold tile ground. I can always clean it up alter. For as long as I can remember…I've been fascinated by my blood. The way it looks, seeping from my body, leaving me drained…the color…vivid crimson…a beautiful color…the smell…scent of iron and copper…the scent stains my tongue…forever I taste it…forever I will crave it…I slowly bring my arm to my mouth, pressing my lips to my skin, the intoxicating scent and taste filling my senses to the brim. I feel the thick liquid running down my throat and into my stomach…it reminds me of the hunger I have long since lost. This is it. This is who I have become. Nobody understands…nobody could ever understand how I feel…I'd never want them too…to push the burden onto them is something I could never do…They would be devastated…so I deal with this alone…There was one who understood…but he's gone now…along with all my hopes and dreams of a better future. It's all gone now…This is all I have left…I sigh yet again as my drained blood loss leaves me weak. I slide farther into the tub, clutching my arm to me. My eyes slowly close and I am reminded why I never sleep…your face behind closed eyelids…forever there…forever haunting…taunting…The only way I get sleep is this…When I am too empty to dream…When I am too lost to scream…A small smile touches my lips as I sip from the conscious world…Ice blue eyes…

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

~*~Normal POV~*~With Hikari and Sakari~*~

"I am twenty, curly brown hair, hazel eyes…not just looking for love, just a friend to talk to…" Sakari typed, using the hunt and peck method. "Uh…What else? Want another roommate, sick of my first one…"

"Hey!" Hikari protested. Sakari giggled. 

"Just kidding, Hikari-chan." She turned to face the computer she had just been typing on. 

"Who's gonna answer this? Nobody! The internet is for horny guys out to rape us and then kill us so we don't tell anybody…" Hikari muttered. Sakari sighed, shaking her head.

"Okay, your turn." She moved from the chair as Hikari took her place to type a profile for herself. Sakari looked around the spacious apartment she had rented with Hikari. The tow had been bored, so they decided to go on a search for an Internet buddy, hopefully from another country. They created some profiles and they were excited for an answer.

Hikari yawned as she types in her final sentences. "I'm going to bed. How bout you?"

"You know I'm not." Sakari said. "Leave the computer on for me." Sakari always stayed up late. 

Hikari trudged off to her room, feeling extremely tired. Life in America got pretty busy. She couldn't help but think how glad she was to be there, especially since Kaiba Seto, Sakari's idle, lived there. Rumored to live somewhere in California. Although she didn't believe rumors…This one was known to have been proven. She crawled into bed and hugged her Keno-ohki doll, her favorite stuffed animal. Even as a twenty-year-old collage student, it still gave her comfort. She couldn't really explain it. With a deep sigh she closed her eye and fell asleep almost immediately. 

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

The morning wasn't much different. Hikari almost always woke up before Sakari now matter who it was that went to bed first. Hikari jumped into the bathroom, she was definitely a morning person. She took s quick shower, got dressed and hopped into the kitchen, her short wet hair spraying water droplets everywhere. You'd think she'd never heard of a blow dryer or something. She quickly whipped up some buttermilk pancakes. (right now I'm on a pancake fetish…) It was her specially. 

"SAKA-CHAN! WAKIE, WAKIE! I MADE PANCAKES! YEP, YEP!" Hikari screamed. Sakari groggily walked out of her bedroom.

"What time is it? And did you have to screech so loud? Jeez…" she muttered. "You know I hate your Shampoo impression…" she muttered. Hikari pouted.

"Anyway…I made pancakes! So get you lazy butt over here!" she said smiling. Sakari nodded, too tired to argue and walked to the dining room table where the freshly made pancakes were still streaming. She loved Hikari's pancakes, even if she would never tell her…she'd hold her to it for the rest of her life. Hikari sat at the table a few seconds later, shivering. "Damn it! I hate Minnesota! Ish so cold! Whhhhhyyyyyy does it have to be so cold!?" she whined. Sakari giggled at her. "S-Stop l-laughing a-at m-me! Ish n-not nice!" she stuttered shivering.

"Eat some pancakes, that'll make you warm." Sakari suggested. Hikari nodded and they both picked up their forks.

"Ikidakimasu!" they chanted together, giggling at their foolishness. Hikari pushed in her chair and took her dirty dishes to the sink when she was done. She was always a fast eater.

"I wonder if anyone replied to our distress signal…" Hikari mumbled, walking over to their computer. She logged on and was happy to see they had about fifteen e-mails or so. She opened the first one, the smile instantly falling from her face.

"Saka…I told you these were horny men only wanting to rape us…" Hikari mumbled with a sweatdrop. "Listen to this, 'Male, age 31, recently divorced and incarcerated for savagely raping his daughter, wife and pet…goat…just got out of jail…for…attempting to rape their cat…OOOOKAY! This is where I stop reading, good-bye Mr. Perve guy…" Hikari said, clicking delete on that e-mail. 

"C'mon, it can't all be bad! Check another one!" Sakari insisted. Hikari looked at her with a raised eyebrow. Sakari waved her hands in the air. "C'mon! Just one more!" Hikari opened one, hesitantly. She sweatdropped. 

"Female, age 17, run away from Russia…Likes dark cats, dark nights, dark…and it goes on to list everything she likes dark…is a…Lesbian?!" Hikari's face stained bright red. Sakari cocked her head to the side.

"I thought you didn't have anything against lesbians…" she murmured.

"I-I don't…as long as they don't hit on me…A-and this chick kept going on about what she wants to do to us…mainly in a threesome…" Hikari said, twitching.

"GAH! DELETE! DELETE!" Sakari screamed. Hikari did so and turned to glare at Sakari. "C'mon, what are you waiting for, try another one." She said as if she should know. Hikari shook her head.

"Uh-uh! I aint gonna read another one of those perversed, mortified, deranged, mentally challenged psychos!" Hikari screamed.

"C'mon! Just ONE more!" Sakari begged, unleashing the big giant puppy dog eyes of doom. Hikari looked away.

"Oh no! You are not going to get me with those again!" she screamed. But…she just had to looks back, and then she was lost to the sparkly shiny big puppy dog eyes. "Fine! But this ones the last one!" she swore. Sakari nodded. Hikari clicked a few times to open up a different e-mail.

"Male, age 20, ooh same age as us! Um…From Japan, Domino, hey, isn't that where that guy Kaiba Seto is from? Hm…Just looking for friends…Wishes to make a genuine connection with another human being…Blond hair, brown eyes…ooh just my kind of guy…" Hikari murmured turning to Sakari.

"Meh," she shrugged. "Not mine…" she muttered. Hikari shrugged and kept reading.

"Looking to move out and away from Japan…says his friends deserted him. Aw…that's so sad! Can we have him Saka?! Please!" Hikari begged. Sakari nodded.

"Yea, he sounds cool. Send him an e-mail telling him the invitation is open as long as he doesn't find it offending to have two female roommates! Rent is 350 a month and its okay if he cant pay it right away." Hikari nodded and continued typing. She was a faster typer than Sakari could ever hope to be.

"His e-mail is Blue-Eyes-Lover…Hm…I wonder if he means the eye color or the Duel Monster…And if he means the Duel Monster maybe he's like in love with Kaiba Seto or something…" she murmured.

"Maybe. We should ask him when he gets here." Sakari said. Hikari nodded and punched the enter key.

"There! Now all we have to do is wait for an answer!"

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

~*~Jounouchi's POV~*~

"'P.S. It's okay if you cant manage rent for the first couple of months.' Well, that's pretty nice of them." I type a farther reply top Hikari and Sakari. 'Great! Please meet me at the airport in Minneapolis. Hope one of you has a car. I'll be arriving on Dec. 16th at about three p.m. Cant wait to meet both of you!' I logged off and leaned back in my office style chair. I am glad I can finally leave Japan…All these memories when I walk by the park or what used to be the Kaiba mansion…I smile. He turned it into an orphanage. The scars of being forgotten seem to throb whenever I am reminded of my friends or what's left of my family. I'm not allowed to contact my sister, Shizuka or anything…I can't stand this. I yawn saddened and was just stretching when a burning pain erupted in the middle of my left arm. I stopped stretching but didn't bother to look. It was my recently bandaged arm. I forgot about that…I hope those two don't mind bloodstains…I think back…trying to remember when I first started. Oh yeah…Back when you had abandoned me. The last person I lived for…

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

A part of me wishes I would have told you…at least…a little bit of what I'm feeling…maybe you could have helped me figure out what it was even…I sigh exasperatedly…_I _don't even know what I'm feeling…I'm almost sure I never felt love for anyone but…when I think about you…that promise to never let myself be hurt that way…It seems I forgot about it. The minute you left me…I was instantly reminded of that promise…And I'll be forever mindful of what you've done to me…I laugh bitterly…You don't even know…I pour my heart out to you every single day and…you never knew…I'll never tell you…I am oblivious to the salty tears that are suddenly flowing out of my eyes. So many tears have gone by…I lost count a while ago…It doesn't matter. I'm not crying…My heart just refuses to let go. My heart weeps for you…But _I _will not. I will not cry for something that will never know. Something that could never understand…I suppose I am his dog in the end…following master to the bitter end...waiting for master to come home…Although…I don't think I mind that all too much…

~*~Hikari + Sakari~*~

"He'll be here on Dec. 16th, we have to meet him at the airport at three o'clock. That works for me, I don't have work that day…" Hikari murmured looking at her calendar. "Do you?" she asked, turning to Saka. 

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

"Ha, ha…" Hikari knew well that Sakari was currently out of work, since she had just quit her previous job. Sakari was looking into a job as a writer of some kind, but was having trouble so far. Hikari and Sakari both enjoyed writing very much and Saka embarrassingly admitted she was a bit jealous of Hikari's job as a newspaper article writer, for the Pioneer Press and Star Tribune. (Ying Fa: Te-he I wish!) 

"Of course I'm open. We can take my car."

"Why your?" Hikari complained. 

"Mine's got more space. You never know how much he's bringing." 

"True."

Sakari tried to bump Hikari over. "Okay, off the computer, I've got a resume to type up."

"Hey! I'm not done yet! Wait your turn!" Hikari protested. "My reports are due tomorrow. I've gotta finish it up before I'm done…Totally swamped with homework and job work…dang…"

"Sakari sighed. "Well, hurry up." Sakari decided to go and get a drink while she waited. Suddenly the doorbell rang. "Got it!" Sakari called. She opened the door to see a guy with an armful of papers.

"Hello! I'm Ryan and the Mall of America has a new store opening. They're making me advertise." He said with a genki smile. "This has some information on it. They're making a big deal out of it 'cause it's being opened by Seto Kaiba. You know, that technology guy from Japan…?"

"Yeah, I know. Thanks." Sakari took the neon green papers and said, "We'll be sure to check it out."

After she closed the door with her only open body part, her foot, she muttered, "and it's Kaiba Seto, dumbshit." After reading about it, she yelled loudly to her roommate. "Hey, Hikari-chan! I think I've got an idea for what to do with our new friend…hey, did you ever get his name?"

"He signs off as Jou." Hikari yelled back. "We'll have to ask when he gets here, wont we?"

"Or we can just call him Jou." Sakari said, rolling her eyes. She finished off her cappuccino, tossed her cup into the sink for Kari to take care of, and headed out to get the mail. 

~*~Normal POV~*~On Dec. 15th with Jou~*~

"Please fasten your seatbelts for lift-off, we'll be stopping in California for fuel restock and then we're going nonstop to Minnesota. Have a good flight."

Jou clicked the seat belt into place, actually a little excited to meet his new friends. They had been sending e-mails back and forth for the past couple of weeks. Jou gathered that Sakari had curly brown hair and hazel eyes, while Hikari had auburn hair with mahogany colored eyes. Sakari was creative out going, and very disorganized. Hikari though, was more sensible fun loving and sweet. Jou reclined his chair and stared out at the ground and buildings, which were getting small and smaller as the plane ascended. This was Jou's first time flying; he was mildly surprised he'd found the recliner handle on his first try. About three hours later lunch trays went out, but Jou wasn't hungry. The flight was horridly long, over thirteen hours…But that didn't bother Jounouchi, he was actually happy it took that long…It proved he was getting farther and farther away from those who hurt him. He smiled; he would always be thirteen hours away, always one step ahead. Soon the captain was announcing that the plane was arriving in Minneapolis. Jou put his seat belt on and moved his chair into its normal position. Jou was soon getting off the plane, even more excited. He was finally in America.

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

Hikari had told him she would be wearing a neon pink tank top with a white skirt, just so he would recognize her. He, in turn, has told her he would be wearing a white t-shirt with a green jacket and a pair of baggy blue jeans. He looked around, hoping to see some sign of curly brown hair or straight auburn. He spotted them not far away, his face flushed lightly, they were pretty. (Our anime selves are how we believe ourselves to look…They are pretty, we, sadly, are not…-.-*cries* ) 

"Hikari! Sakari!" he shouted, his Japanese accent setting in heavily. Hikari and Sakari looked in the direction their names had been called. Hikari grinned and jumped up.

"Konnichiwa, Blue-Eyes-Lover!" she screamed. Jou flushed lightly coming to stand beside them. Hikari stuck out her hand. "Wakarimashita, atashi wa Warui, Hikari desu!" she squealed genki-ly. Jounouchi smiled, he was glad they knew Japanese, his English wasn't too good yet and he could use some help.

"Un. Wakarimashita. Ore ga Jounouchi, Katsuya desu." He said, taking her hand, smiling broadly. 

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

"Um…What the hell are you two talking about?" Sakari asked. Her Japanese wasn't exactly 'up to scratch'. She turned to Jou. "Sakari. It's really nice to meet you!" she grinned happily. "It's Katsuya, ne?" 

"Hai." Jounouchi answered as her words registered in his head. 

"Very cool name."

"Arigatou. So…" he said, testing himself on English. "This is America! It's great!" 

Hikari smiled at him. "Yeah, you get used to its boring-ness."

As the three were walking to the luggage carousel, they spoke half Japanese and half English about things. As it turned out, Jou didn't have too much to carry. Only four suitcases. Sakari and Hikari insisted on taking the four cases themselves so he didn't have to carry anything.

"Well, this is my car." Sakari said when they got to it. "Pop the trunk Hikari-chan." 

They loaded Jou's suitcases into the trunk.

"He's gonna sit by me!" Sakari whispered.

"Why you? I saw him first!"

"You aren't gonna make him sit in the back are you? And I'm driving!" 

Hikari growled and gave up. For the whole ride back, the three talked, and told each other about themselves. When they arrived, Sakari pulled into a parking spot while hikari said, "Welcome to your new home." In Japanese.

"We've got a three bedroom apartment, so you don't have to sleep with us or anything." Sakari said with a grin.

"Dang it, I was really looking forward to it too…" Jounouchi joked. They all laughed. 

"Do you listen to a lot of music?" Hikari asked as they all sat at the kitchen table.

"Hai…um, a little. Mostly inspirational stuff…I don't know…"

Much to both Jou and Hikari's surprise, Sakari murmured a long line of Japanese.

"Utsuru toki o osorenai de."

Jou smiled. "Don't be afraid of looking at your reflection." He nodded. "Yeah, that kind of thing."

"Hey! Isn't that from 'Sleepless Beauty'? From Nittle Grasper?" Hikari asked, although she already knew it was.

"Yeah, I like that song."

*Little input from Ying Fa*

"I listen to a lot of Japanese music, Jou, so you'll feel right at home. Anime rocks!" Jou's eyes lighted up.

"You watch anime too?!" 

"Yes! I blast that Japanese music from here to the heavens! He-he I love it!" she squealed. Jou smiled back.

*Ok, I'm done*

By about 4:30, they were all starting to get hungry.

"I vote to go out to eat." Sakari said, "I'm too lazy to cool something."

In honor of their new friend, Hikari and Sakari took Jou to a Japanese restaurant called the Sushi Katsu. (Yes that place really exists) Hikari and Jou pointed out words and phrases they knew while explaining them to Sakari. After everyone had literally stuffed themselves silly, they began to head back.

"Groan…I'm so full. Arigatou, Sakari, Hikari." Jou said.

"No problem." Hikari said, eyes on the road. (Yay! We're using my car this time!) 

"Yeah, it was fun! Hope you're not too full." Sakari said. "Kari-chan makes gre…um, makes pretty good pancakes."

"Oh and by the way," Hikari mentioned. "Would you mind being our mediator? Saka-chan and I get into computer-battles and there's-no-more-hot-water! disputes." 

Jou laughed. "I'll do what I can. I suppose it's a good thing I like taking cold showers." By the time they got back, it was almost seven.

"Well, you might want o get unpacked now…"

"Oh no! Kari-chan! You forgot to tape Charmed for me!" Sakari ran from the room seeming very distressed.

"Aw, do it yourself I'm not your damn slave! She gets…weird like that." She explained, seeing the very confused look on Jou's face. "You'll get used to it." She smiled.

"If you say so…" Jou said with a large yawn. "Gods I'm tired!" 

"Yeah? Watch out, Saka and I stay up real late sometimes." Hikari said. "Well your room is over here." Hikari told him, smiling sweetly. She opened the door. "Pretty big, considering most apartments." 

"Arigatou, I like it."

Hikari smiled and little. She noticed Jou had seemed a little uncertain. "Daijoubu?" she asked.

"Hai." Jou sighed. "Gomen…just, tired."

"Okay. Goodnight, Katsuya." Hikari said.

"YEAH, G'NIGHT KATSUYA-KUN!" Sakari shouted from the other room. 

Jou smiled and stepped into his bedroom. After he had unpacked, putting his belongings in drawers, closets and on tables, he crawled into the lavishly blanketed bed. He looked up at the ceiling, thinking back fondly on his first day in America. He had a lot of fun and was especially glad Hikari spoke his tongue…It would help a lot…and while Hikari taught him English, he could teach Sakari Japanese. For the first time in at least six months, Jou slept peacefully, without thoughts and nightmares or death or the night angel that plagued him. For the first time in ages, he was at ease and happy.

**Sakari**

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Xiaolang's Ying Fa: Erm…You all don't mind if this fic is a little off on the dates do you? Cuz…I really need to type more up but I'm getting swamped with homework and Saka can never type fics cuz her mom is a supreme bitch and a very large homophobic…worse than anyone's mom! I apologize if the dates are screwed up…*bows respectfully* I hope you all can forgive us! …Now for all you who have never heard of me before…go read my other fics!! Pretty please!! ^_^ Ja ne!


	2. What I Have Become

Xiaolang's Ying Fa: SAD!! Hardly any reviews for this fic!!! I thought you guys loved me! SAD!! Now I'm sad!! Oh well…I thought you guys deserved a treat so I updated to Mou Issho if y'all would like to go read that instead…Erm…I'm really trying to update to Masquerade…Really I am…It SO hard! I only have like three days to write the party AND a lemon! Now that's SAD! Oh well…Enjoy my Christmas fic, be looking for another one mmkay? 

**********************Last Time************************

Jou smiled and stepped into his bedroom. After he had unpacked, putting his belongings in drawers, closets and on tables, he crawled into the lavishly blanketed bed. He looked up at the ceiling, thinking back fondly on his first day in America. He had a lot of fun and was especially glad Hikari spoke his tongue…It would help a lot…and while Hikari taught him English, he could teach Sakari Japanese. For the first time in at least six months, Jou slept peacefully, without thoughts and nightmares or death or the night angel that plagued him. For the first time in ages, he was at ease and happy.

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**Sakari**

~*~Next Morning~*~

"TASKETE! TASKETE!!! IIE!!" Sakari woke with a start.

"Jou?!" she leaped out of bed and ran down the hallways with 

lightning speed. Hikari jumped out of her room at hearing the ear-piercing scream as well. 

"What's going on?!"

"I don't know!"

"AHHHH!!!" Hikari and Sakari raced into Jou's room, seeing him in his bed, backed away as far as he could be. He was pointing with a shaky finger at the floor. Hikari giggling a bit.

"Saka-chan, you forgot to tell Jounouchi about—" 

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU HAD A PET?!" he screamed, pointing at a shaggy black dog. 

"We don't!" Sakari laughed. "He's a stray that wonders in every four or five days, so I feed him and give him a bath."

"Sakari calls him Scruffy." Hikari said, making a disdainful face and Jou could tell she'd rather the dog not be here as much as him. Don't get him wrong…he liked puppies, but really, he was more a cat type person. "Why were you so afraid of him?"

"What would _you_ do if you woke up in the morning with a huge black dog panting in your face?!" Sakari giggled and Hikari murmured something about shooting it with a bebe gun. Still giggling, Saka knelt down.

"Hey, Scruffy, how ya doin' boy? You hungry? Come on!" Sakari got up and walked off, Scruffy at her side. Hikari walked with a now calmer Jou.

"He's one of the nicer dogs I've met…Although, my history with dogs goes back many, many years…So don't take my opinion of them to heart. He's Saka's dog, I won't have anything to do with him." Her voice was laced in ice, and Jou could tell she'd went through some hardships.

When the two had reached the kitchen, Scruffy was scarfing down a bowl of dog food. And Sakari was setting the table. Hikari started on her pancakes with Jou's help. 

*Dog scene altered by Xiaolang's Ying Fa for personal reasons*

After breakfast, Hikari looked up from her dishes. 

"Hey, Jou? There's an awesome mall not far from here. It's got about two hundred stores. _And…_" Kari paused dramatically, "The famous Kaiba Seto from Japan is opening a way cool tech store there! You wanna go?" 

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

To both Hikari and Sakari's surprise, Jou froze, his eyes widening and turning to a dull, dead brown. His face paled and he looked like he was going to be very, _very_ sick. Hikari gently set her hand on his shoulder.

"Are you alright, Jounouchi-kun?" she asked, she had begun to call him Jounouchi instead of Katsuya because it was respectable. When they'd first met, they didn't know his first name had been Katsuya. Jounouchi nodded solemnly. 

"Yea…" he said, turning his head away. "Sorry…I just…" Jounouchi trailed off. Saka and Kari looked at each other, both wondering what they had said to make him so upset. They drew a blank so they tried again. 

"It's alright. But, would you like to go to the mall with us? They have a lot of anime stuff there! We can go to Suncoast and Hot Topic!" Hikari informed happily. Those were her favorite stores. Jounouchi looked up, confused. 

"Does our school have a dress code?" he asked. A while ago they had decided Jou would attend their college.

"Kind of, girls can't show half their stuff and guys cant walk around with their pants down to their knees." Sakari said. Jou nodded.

"So no uniform?" he asked. Sakari shook her head.

"Nope! We're free!" she said. Jou smiled a bit. 

"That's great. I thought I'd have to spend another three years in a god damned uniform…My last one was horrible enough!" he said. Hikari giggled, happy that Jou was back. Something suddenly dawned on her.

"Hey, do you know a boy named Bakura Ryou?" she asked, smiling widely. Jou nodded, his smile growing.

"Yes actually, he's my…or…he _was_ my boyfriend for about two months one year ago. He's one of my best friends!" Jounouchi said. Hikari smiled.

"I grew up with him!" she nearly screamed.

"Really?" 

"Wait a minute…_boy_friend?" Sakari asked. Jou turned to her, as did Hikari, she apparently hadn't heard that part. 

"Ya. He was my second boyfriend before he finally confessed his love to another boy named Bakura." Jounouchi said, unknowing of the girls' dismay.

"You're yaoi?" Hikari asked. Jounouchi nodded. 

"That too. I'm bi-sexual. Most people in Japan are." He murmured. Hikari sighed audibly.

"I had a feeling you were yaoi…That is so cute! I love that!" she squealed. Jounouchi blushed. 

"Me too!! ^_^" Sakari said. 

"So…you guys don't have a problem with it?" he asked. 

"Nope." Hikari said. Saka shook her head. 

"Nope." She said as well. Jounouchi sighed, they had just quelled one of his biggest fears. His first was his undeniable bloodlust.

"Have you guys heard of Gravitation?" he asked. They both squealed. 

"HAI!" he smiled, this was going to be a good relationship after all. 

~*~Later~*~

"I'm driving!" Hikari called. Sakari pouted. 

"No! I'm driving! We're taking _my_ car!" she said. Hikari shook her head.

"Na uh! I'm taking us out to eat so I get to drive!" she called. Sakari fumed. 

"Just because I don't have money to throw around doesn't mean you can shove it in my face!" she screamed out to Hikari who had already disappeared down the hall. Jounouchi stopped in front of Sakari. 

"She's got a point though, besides, what does it matter? I'll ride in back no big deal!" he said laughing. He had never been happier, he hadn't laughed like this since…since_ he_ left! Jounouchi didn't let that get to him though. He turned and chased Hikari down the hallway to the garage. Hikari shrieked as Jounouchi caught up with her. "Gotcha!" he said, trying out American slang. Hikari laughed. Japanese accents did _not_ sound well attempting American slang. 

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

"Lemme go, Jou-kun!"

Sakari came up behind the two of them. "Okay, you lovebirds, let's go, already!"

Blushing slightly, the two ended their onslaughts and the three piled into the car. As the trip went on, Jou, Kari and Saka talked and laughed. Jou was happy to be at ease again, to be able to talk to people without sounding depressed, and having friends again. His obsession with his own blood seemed to be at bay for the time, and, to top it off, no uniform. For Jounouchi, this was almost as good as it could get. 

Finally, they arrived and found a parking spot. Heading into the building, Sakari was excitedly throwing ideas. 

"Ooh, we have to take him to Camp Snoopy and get him on the mighty axe!(Ying Fa: *is not sure if Camp snoopy is only a Minnesota thing…* Um, its an amusement park inside of a huge mall. -.-, gomen if you have no idea…) And we gotta get a whole bunch of those gumballs where there's a jillion different flavors and…"

"Settle down, we'll do that later, right now we're going to the food court, remember?" Hikari yelled. Sakari sweatdropped. 

"Oh yeah."

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

Hikari turned to Jou.

"Would you like to eat some American food or do you want some sushi?" she asked. Jounouchi thought for a moment. 

"I think I'll be brave. I want some Amerika-jin food." He said. Hikari let out an exasperated sigh. 

"Thank god! I hate sushi! ^_^" Jounouchi smiled. 

"Is there a foreign currency shop here?" he asked. 

"Um…I think so…on the second floor. We'll go there first."

"Good, I have my Japanese money with my so I need to get it switched with American money. My dad gave my access to my college fund and I've already paid for it while I was back in Japan. American school don't cost that much, do they?" he asked. 

"Nope, we're cheap! He-he." Hikari and Sakari said together. Jou laughed. His dad…Just saying those words made him miss his old man. Sure he hadn't been the father of the year figure…and he wasn't always home but…he was his dad. And he loved him. His dad had supported him, actually suggested him to move from Japan. He saw how bad Jounouchi was sinking in…the best thing to do was get him away from the place that hurt him so bad. As Hikari and Saka chatted away while getting food, Jounouchi sank deeper and deeper into his thoughts. He thought about his school, his dad, his sister…But most of all, he thought about the last conversation he knew he'd ever have with his best friend. 

~*~Flashback in Normal POV~*~

"Jounouchi!" a surprised looking Yuugi cried out, walking from behind the Game Shop counter to stand in front of his formerly forsaken friend. 

"Hai, konnichiwa Yuugi." He murmured, not liking the idea of ever having to talk to his backstabbing friend after all he had, or was it hadn't, done to him. Yuugi looked at him evenly, as if he should have to pay to be in his presence. 

"Well? What do you want?" he asked, turning back around. "I'm a busy person, Jounouchi, I don't have all day." He muttered, waving his hand nonchalantly. Jounouchi bristled in anger before he pushed it down.

"I'm moving to America. I came to say good bye." Gods, Jounouchi hoped Yuugi would react. He loved him so much as his friend…but ever since he and his yami became intimately conjoined to the hip, Yuugi began to disappear more often…He was snappy to everyone, even Jii-chan. Up until his death Yuugi was almost never out of his soulroom. Jounouchi figured that's what saved him. It was horrible to think that it took everything to try and make him realize…but it was his grandfather's death that surely made him understand. 

"So what? After Kaiba left you went invisible anyway." He said. Jounouchi's heart broke. His last friend…After Honda moved to England with Ryou…he didn't ever think Yuugi would do that same…His parting with Honda had been earlier that year…that was more emotional than he would've imagined. He loved them both…Even loved Ryou _that_ way once too…it was incredibly difficult. Honda had been his best friend since before he could even remember. He never thought Yuugi would desert him…That way he looked at him…like he was nothing.

"Well?" Yuugi continued, "Are you just going to stand there or what? I hardly notice you anyways, just go, maybe you can find someone to bone you there doggy-boy." Yuugi's voice cut daggers through Jou's already broken heart, ripping the mending pieces and tearing the vulnerably places. He turned, unable to say anything to his once best friend. He was alone now…there really wasn't anything left for him in Japan. Empty memories…That he hoped would soon fade away. The last thing he saw, Yuugi's piercing amethyst eyes digging holes into his skin as he left more depressed that when he had come. 

~*~End Flashback~*~

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

Jou sighed as he tried to shake the thought from his head. That was ancient history…He'd get over it.

"Here we are!" Hikari told him, breaking him from his thoughts.

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

Jou's eyes widened. It was the biggest food court he'd ever seen in his life.

"Wow, I don't thing I've ever seen so many restaurants in one place…" he murmured, as he was looking around he could have sworn he saw the familiar swing of a familiar blue trench coat on a man with familiar shaggy brown hair. He blinked and shook his head, seeing nothing when he looked a second time.

"Daijoubu yo? Jounouchi-kun?" Hikari asked. He faced her blankly.

"You looked real sad all the sudden…" Sakari murmured. Jounouchi shook his head.

"Gomen, gomen…I…just thought I saw somebody for a second…" he said smiling lightly. 

"An old friend?" Hikari asked.

"An old _boy_friend?" Sakari goaded. Jounouchi flushed. Him? Jou's boyfriend? Nah. Gee, that sounded convincing…what exactly _did_ he feel for the man?

"No…just an enemy." He said. Kari and Saka shrugged. 

"Oh. Well, no use in dwelling in the past! C'mon! Let's go get some food!" Hikari said as she pulled Jounouchi toward the Arby's. 

"Here we go again…" Saka muttered, shaking her head.

"What?" Jou questioned.

"Hikari-chan's fetish for Arby's roast beef sandwiches…and loads of Arby sauce. Then she claims she hates barbecue sauce…*sigh*." Hikari pouted.

"Well, there's a difference! BBQ is gross! Arby sauce is way better!" 

"Sure…" Saka muttered. 

"I don't care…" Jounouchi murmured. "As long as we eat!" he said happily. 

**Hikari**

**Sakari**

~*~Later~*~

"Boy oh boy…" Jounouchi murmured. "That was good, surprisingly good!" 

"Sakari was just polishing off her beef and cheddar when she decided to comment. "Yeah, well…its an improvement over sushi…" Jou grinned as Hikari turned partially green.

"Uh…right." She mumbled.

"Now, who's ready to go shopping?!"

On their way out, they saw an ad for 'Remember the Titans'. 

"Hey, isn't that the one with the blond gay guy?" 

**Sakari**

**Hikari**

Hikari shrugged.

"I dunno, I never saw that movie…" she mumbled, still feeling a bit full. They stepped out of the food court and faced Jounouchi.

"How come all the hot guys are always gay?" Hikari asked suddenly out of nowhere. Jounouchi blushed. 

"I suppose that's a good thing for me…" he said, smiling a bit. His stomach made an odd noise and he turned away. "Is there any bathrooms nearby? I think I had too much soda." he said laughing hollowly. Kari and Saka didn't buy it…they knew there was something wrong with their newfound friend…

"Yeah." Hikari nodded. "C'mon, we'll show you."

The three reached the bathrooms and Jounouchi looked almost apologetic. He walked into the male bathroom and looked around, glad to see it empty. He turned into one of the stalls and closed it behind himself just in case. He hated this…he hated how that man effected him…he couldn't even properly hold down food anymore…he was sinking deeper and deeper into the shadows and he didn't know if he would ever be able to get out…He fell to his knees beside the toilet bowl and reached his hand up to his mouth. He still hadn't got this technique accurately mastered, he still had to have the help of his finger. He reached down his throat with his index finger, pushing roughly against his gag reflexes, causing himself to lurch and spill his stomach's contents into the toilet. He repeated this method a few more times until he was sure his stomach was empty. Tears flew down his face as he wiped a bit of blood from his mouth along with his juices. It hurt more each time…Thinking of him…Amber eyes poured salty tears, relentlessly. Why? Why did it have to be this way? It shouldn't have to be this way…Ice blue eyes…

**Hikari**

************************************************

Ying Fa: Well…that was kinda short…I'm trying really I am! We're at page like 60 in our notebook and to type all that up is…such a bitch…Arg…Oh well. Please review and don't be too angry if the dates are screwed over because of my lazy ass. (so many stories to type up…uhgnngngg….) I;'m sorry I couldn't thank the few reviewrs right now! O will later k? Oh! Someone wanted key…Erm…If I can find them all here ya go

Wakarimashita: Supposed to mean nice to meet you but I don't speak Japanese don't hold me to it…

Atashi: 'I' for girls

Ore ga: 'I' for boys…

Kawaii: Cute

Gomen: Sorry, Gomen ne sai: I'm sorry, really sorry, something like that…

Daijoubu yo: Are you all right

Hai: Yes

Iie: No

Taskete: Japanese slur, real way of writing it: Tasuke: Help

Utsuru toki o osorenai de: Beats the hell out of me! It's from a song and I'm way too lazy to go and look up the lyrics.

Urg…Is that all? I dunno…Please remember to review!!!


	3. Ch3 Yes I'm too lazy to name the chappie...

Xiaolang's Ying Fa: In light of the Christmas holiday of '04, I have decided to finish up this story, just because the lemon is fucking awesome. So…you guys can just skim all this crap until Mokuba comes to Hikari and Sakari's house if you want, I'll admit everything is kinda all for our amusement, and not really that important for the plot,

JUST PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT JOU-CHAN SAYS SOMETIMES!

Okay, I'm done, have a good read.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

xXSakariXx

OoOOutside with Hikari and SakariOoO

"I wonder what's wrong with him…" Sakari stated.

"Me too…" Hikari replied. "I mean…he looked so…dead, ya know?"

"Yeah…We'll figure it out, don't worry…for now, lets just have it drop. We don't want to upset him more…"

OoOLater, walking through the mall…OoO

"Hey, Jou? What other things are you interested in?"

xXSakariXx

xXHikariXx

Jounouchi shrugged.

"A lot of stuff. I…like stuffed koinu plushies for some odd reason…" he murmured, turning red in the face lightly. "Oh and I like Duel Monsters!" he said.

"That's right! You came in second in Duelist Kingdom didn't you? Right behind Mutou Yuugi, ne?" Hikari asked. Jounouchi turned away.

"Don't mention that name around me…"

"Why? I thought you two were best friends…" Saka murmured, seeing by the look on Jou's face to be the obvious answer.

"We had a bit of an…_argument_…When I left." Jou said. Both knew when he said, argument, he meant a friendship breaking dispute.

"I'm…sorry…" Hikari mumbled.

"Yea, me too." Saka said. Jou smiled. They both looked so truthful, how could he be mad at them?

"Nah, it's fine." He said.

xXHikariXx

xXSakariXx

The two still looked concerned, but they left it.

"Here we are!" Hikari said suddenly. "Hot Topic first!" Hikari screeched as they reached the second floor. Sakari rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, yeah…" she said. She turned to Jou, who had an amazed look on his face. (ATTENTION! This is an important authoress' note! I have been informed that because this fic does not have enough Kaijou 'action' as you guys say, is the reason no one is reading it. From this point on, I am going to butcher mine and Sakari's story line for the sake of a good reading. Most of the stuff in our notebook it personal stuff that only we'd think is funny anyways, so, from this point on, its almost all Xiaolang's Ying Fa! Gomen ne sai, Saka, we'll have to do another one another time! One without us in it…So I am not going to label who is writing what any longer!)

"We all love hot topic…its just that whenever we start out here, we spend a whole bunch of our money."

"But that's okay! C'mon! We so have to get you Goth-ed up Jounouchi-kun!" Hikari screamed. "You'd look way hot as a goth!" Saka nudged him.

"Yup! Great way to catch up some guys! Or girls…either way! It's great for attracting people!" she said. Jounouchi laughed nervously as Hikari grabbed his hand and began running. Just as they turned a corner, Jounouchi ran straight into a tall man, nearly knocking them both down. He was spun around but when he turned to apologize, no one was there. A strong musty scent hit his nose sharply as he searched the area with his eyes. He recognized that scent…but from who? He didn't have long to think as Hikari began stuttering apologies at him. He shook his head, turning back to her.

"Don't worry, I'm fine…I just wish I would've seen who I ran into…" Jounouchi mumbled.

"I think he wearing a long blue trench coat…Hm." Saka murmured. "Oh well! Let's get going shall we?" Jounouchi gulped, he suddenly felt very sick. Hikari grabbed his arm again and Jounouchi gasped. She stopped and fixed worried reddish/brown eye onto Jounouchi golden one.

"What's wrong?" she asked. He shook his head, looking away. Then he sighed. He moved his hands to the hem of his long sleeve t-shirt and removed it. He was wearing a short sleeve t-shirt underneath. Hikari and Sakari gasped in surprise as his scratch covered arms became visible. Long ones, short ones, everywhere on his arms.

"You'd find out sooner or later…Gomen…" he whispered, tugging his shirt back on.

"Great, we just had to pick someone who destroys himself! Jeez!" Sakari groaned. Hikari frowned at their new friend and shook her head.

"You shouldn't do that." She said. "But…I suppose that's your choice."

"We're not angry…So, just try to stop. You're far away from whoever causes you to do that…So you don't have a reason anymore. Also, I want you to try and keep down everything that goes into your mouth." Sakari said bitterly. Just one look at his arms and she'd realized what he did in that bathroom. He nodded solemnly. Hikari smiled.

"Don't worry, we'd never kick you out. So, c'mon, let's try and have a good time." She said, taking a guess at what he was thinking.

Sakari sighed as he face relaxed a little.

"Gomen, Jounouchi-kun. I didn't mean to sound so harsh…Really, I…"

"No big deal." Jounouchi said. "It's okay. Arigatou, erm, thanks."

"O-kay, too tense for me, let's go!"

Sooner rather than later, Hikari's and Sakari's warped minds got Jounouchi into Hot Topic. Needless to say, he was a little freaked out at first and most of the dudes in there had hair like Honda! Hikari and Sakari made him buy a fishnet shirt which they said would be 'so totally hot!' and to which he blushed furiously. Jounouchi actually thought people wore those shirts without anything else! He nearly thought he'd freeze!

After a little while longer, Hikari had ended up buying a pretty hot pink dress with buckles, and Sakari a shirt with a faeri with ripped torn wings in the center. They had also made Jounouchi buy some pants and a few wristbands, particularly a rainbow colored one. Hikari and Sakari told him what it meant only after nearly half the male population in Hot Topic groped him. He blushed modestly and said he already knew what it meant…he just didn't think it was that uncommon in America has it wasn't in Japan.

After Hot Topic was finished, although they dragged a screaming Hikari out the doors, they went on to Suncoast, and then to Wizards of the Coast, and then finally to Camp Snoopy. (Which is an indoor mini theme park)

"SCREAMING YELLOW EAGLE!!!!!" Hikari and Sakari shrieked.

"Wow, what's that one?" Jounouchi asked pointing to an axe like ride. Hikari shuddered.

"We're not going on that one…not after all those poor people got stuck upside down for nearly two hours! Some got irreversible brain damage!" she shuddered again.

"She's over cautious…" Sakari whispered to the blond.

"Better safe than sorry!" she yelled, having heard her. "…but maybe it'll be okay to go on at least once…But no more after that!"

"Okay, okay, lets go to the yella eagle, k?" she screaming running forward.

"Aiya! Chotto matte ne!" Hikari yelled, chasing Sakari with her arms flailing in the air. Jounouchi shook his head at their antics and followed after. He turned a corner and was immediately stilled by a short black haired boy running straight into him.

"Gomen ne sai! You're not hurt are you?!" the boy shouted. Jounouchi managed to confirm that her was all right as the boy took off the way Jou had come, seeming much in a hurry. "Onii-sama!" he faintly heard in the background. It all happened so fast, Jou knew he had to have been hallucinating. Unless that really had been…No, it couldn't have been. Jounouchi shook his head, trying to jar himself out of his daze. He forced himself not to believe it, even if there were obvious clues…the food court…the mall entrance…Just now…No. He shook his head and followed after Hikari and Sakari.

"Jounouchi-kun! What took you so long!?" Saka asked.

"You've been dazed all day…every time we lose you, you come back with this goofy look on you're face…Erm, baka desu. Daijoubu desu ka?" Hikari asked Jounouchi shook his head.

"I keep thinking I see someone…Iie, daijoubu daiyo." Hikari and Sakari nodded.

"Okay…"

"C'mon, let's get going on those rides!"

A while later, they all gathered around the Mighty Axe.

"We so have to go on this." Jounouchi mumbled, staring up at it in awe.

"Psh! That's what those other people said before they were stuck upside down for hours and got brain damage!" Hikari said.

"C'mon, I'm sure they've worked out all the bugs by now! It's been nearly three years since that happened!" Sakari argued. Hikari nodded and they all ran to the ride, managing to find three seats beside the other. They bar came down and they were off, flying through the air and flipping upside down and twirling every which way.

"EEEE!!!" Jounouchi screamed, gripping the bar in a death hold.

"Ooh, ew, gum on the roof! How'd that get there…?"

"A balloon! Poor kid…"

"Oh my god…I'm hallucinating the brunet in the blue trench coat again." Jounouchi said, remaining clam. Hikari raised an eyebrow.

"No you aren't…I see him too! Oh cute! That raven haired boy next to him is so cute!" Hikari screamed, the mighty axe slowing down. Jounouchi's eyes were clued to the brunet head as they were lowered…could it be? Once the bar was up and his seat belt was off he bolted to the area he saw the tow boys. Jounouchi only lost sight of the tall burnet once, but that was all it took. He reached the area and the brothers were nowhere in sight.

"Kuso…" he cursed. Hikari and Sakari came running, finally catching up to him.

"Jounouchi-kun, do you know that ma?" Hikari asked. Jounouchi nodded and Kari turned to Saka. "Saka-chan, didn't that look alike the sweet Kuba-chan we baby-sit?" she asked. Saka nodded.

"Yeah, it did…Hm, I wonder if that was the brother he'd always telling us about…" Jounouchi's eyes widened considerably.

"Do you mean Mokuba?" he asked eagerly.

"He said his name was Kuba…I don't know if that's a nickname…" Saka whispered. Jounouchi nearly fainted. This was too big of a coincidence! It had to be him…it just had to be…

"Gomen we don't know more, Jou-kun…" Hikari said. He shook his head, even if it was him…he didn't want to see him…He…didn't need the pain he would bring back.

"No, it's alright."

"Well…" Sakari said hesitantly. "We will be babysitting him again soon, right Hikari?" Hikari pulled out a small hand-held schedule. "

"Next Tuesday." She said. "We can talk to him then."

"No, really, don't worry about it…" Jounouchi said, a slight hint of desperation in his voice. If "Kuba-chan" was going to come over, Jounouchi knew he'd have to hear about Seto…It was thanks to him he had to suffer through all his self-loathing pain and anguish…All without even realizing it. Talking to Mokuba would only awaken the memories he'd worked so hard to push away.

"Don't worry, I'm sure its just a coincidence, I'm sure he isn't even related to Kaiba Seto."

"Yeah, you're probably right." Jounouchi lied. He knew there was more to it than that. If they babysat Mokuba…of which, Jounouchi knew was actually Mokuba, he would end up meeting up with the man he'd admired from afar.

"Okay…! What rides do we have left?"

x

"You know what we have to do?" Sakari asked as they were on their way out to the car.

"What?"

"When we get home, we're going to have a nice conversation, a _family_ conversation…We're getting everything out in the open. We're going to tell each other everything we've kept secret. Okay?"

Hikari nodded. "Good idea."

"So…we're a family now?" Jounouchi asked, grinning.

"That's what I said, isn't it?"

Feeling very much loved and cared for, Jou leaned back in his seat, breathing in the scents around him, Sakari's perfume, Hikari's shampoo, even the leathery smell of the interior smelled good to him. He knew that at this meeting, he would probably have to tell the girls about his feelings for Seto…and his backstabbing 'friend'…but at least he was sure Hikari and Sakari would be supportive.

They arrived not long after, bringing in their belongings and setting them aside for unpacking later.

"All right…" Sakari said as they gathered in the spacious living room. "Okay, lets start small…Hikari? I did steal your sweater and accidentally shrink it, it wasn't you."

"WHAT?!?! SAKA-CHAN!"

"Sh!" Sakari said. "Settle down, no yelling at each other. As I was saying…I'm sorry."

An awkward silence passes before Sakari started again.

"I…As I was growing up…you, know, as a kid, I was beaten. By my dad." She took a breath. "He never really liked me…What's worse, he didn't beat me because he was drunk, because he never drank. He did it when he was in a…normal state of mind. So he meant it when he'd say that I was a waste of space and that I was a slut."

"How long did it last?" Jounouchi asked.

"Um…I'm not sure…You know, when you're in those kind of situations…you kinda lose track of time until it…just stops. The last I remember it actually stopped was when I moved out on my own with Hikari." Hikari looked horrified.

"Gods, Saka! I'm so sorry!" she said, reaching out for a hug. Jou, who didn't want to be left out (or he just wanted to have a hug) leaned forward and embraced the both of them, creating a group hug.

"Okay." Saka said, blinking a few times. "Your turn, Hikari-chan." Said brunette bit her bottom lip and nodded.

"All right. I…I…was…Well…Saka, do you remember when, before we were really good friends?" Hikari asked, Saka nodded and Jounouchi remained silent, dreading the look he saw in her eyes. "I went to Britain…when I was thirteen…where I met Ryou Bakura and…He and I were more or less the best of friends…But…" Hikari's eyes filled with tears suddenly. "One day…when…when I was out on a walk with him…We…lost track of time…it got dark…late…We…ran into a street gang…They chased us…caught us…beat us…and…raped us…" Hikari said, turning away. "That's why I was so different when I came back…We…we tried to stop them…We actually got a few hits in…" she laughed a bit, in pity on herself and Ryou. "But they only got angrier…Ryou tried to help me…but he was taken down as well…It…wasn't as bad as what they did to me…They thought he was a girl…But…he was still raped…" Hikari's face grew red from crying, the tears falling down his face relentlessly, she made no move to wipe them away. Jounouchi and Sakari's faces were a mix of horror, sympathy, and sheer anger toward their attackers. It was worse for Jounouchi to find out…two people e loved had been beaten and reaped …he should have noticed the signs.

"Oh, Hikari…I can't…I'm so sorry!" Sakari cried.

"Me too…" Jounouchi whispered.

Hikari nodded, knowing of their sincerity. She sniffled and wiped her eyes with a Kleenex and turned to Jounouchi.

"Your turn, Jounouchi." He nodded.

"Well…you already know of most of them…" Hikari and Sakari nodded.

"I…I've got this little crush on…Kaiba Seto…" his face stained red at the look on his friend's faces. "That's kinda why I kept chasing after him today…"

"Jou? Why do you hurt yourself?"

"B…because…well, partly because of him…" Jounouchi said. "And partly because of my so-called friends…"

"What happened?"

"He left." Jounouchi said, his voice cracking. "He left Japan, and he took everything with him…Totally moved…And I think of him every waking second I live…And Yuugi…" his voice echoed anger. "He treated me like shit before I left…Honda moved…and there was no one left who cared. I couldn't sleep without seeing Kaiba…so I had to…had to faint somehow…Blood-loss was easiest.

"Oh, Jounouchi-kun." Hikari whispered lightly, shaking her head suddenly. "Group hug, everyone." She said with a small smile.

There had been some kind of devastating trauma in each of their lives…these moments made them stronger…made them who they were.

"I'm glad we did this." Hikari said. Jounouchi nodded.

"That's right. No more secrets."

"All right." Sakari agreed. "It's late, let's get some sleep."

They went their separate ways, feeling renewed somehow…feeling as if a huge weight had been lifted from their bodies. Hikari, he memory relieved, felt the pain again, remembering the night she had lost her purity…and Ryou…She crawled into bed, hugging her Keno-Ohki and Wormmon plushies to her. Sakari felt as if a large burden had been lifted from her, yet…those insults…the burn scars on her arms…It was hard. Hard to repeat that time in her childhood, even to her closest friends, who seemed so much like family to her. And Jounouchi…It had been so difficult for him…hearing about his friends…being raped…being beaten…being hurt. As he was lying down, thinking of Hikari, Sakari, Ryou, and the pain they must have suffered, hardly thinking of himself until he closed his eyes for sleep. That sudden vision of Seto Kaiba…icy blue eyes…shook him from his sleepiness. Breathing a little faster, Jounouchi sat up.

'I thought I got rid of him…' Jounouchi thought miserably. He was about to get up and relieve himself of his problem…when Hikari's voice rang through his head.

'You shouldn't do that…but I guess that's your choice.'

Tears stung at his eyes and burned his cheeks. "My choice…" he whispered with small quiet sob. "How can I get rid of him…Now that he's in Minnesota…how could I forget? …I'm scared…I can't see him again…he left me…He never cared…All I am to him is some puppy-dog…gods…But I want to see him…I want to touch him…and kiss him…I want him to hold me and take away my pain…Gods…how can I love someone I hate?" Jounouchi's thoughts drifted until he finally fell asleep. Nightmares followed. He would never be rid of them…The dark angel that was always haunting his dreams…He'd run from him…he'd hide from him…But still he'd find him…Grab him sometimes…Hold him until he would beg to be let go…He would taunt him…on how he couldn't protect his sister like he could protect Mokuba…Would call him his dog…Then sometimes he wouldn't even say anything…Just stare at him with those cold, cruel azure eyes.

Jounouchi awoke the next morning, drenched in sweat and tears. His eyes were red and his nose was running. He could taste his tears in his mouth. He got out of bed and quickly composed himself. He walked into the kitchen, seeing Hikari already at work.

"Ohayo Jou-chan. I'm making French toast this morning, would you like some?" she asked. She looked over at him, the smile disappearing from her face. She stopped what she was doing and walked over to Jounouchi's tense body. She quickly enveloped him into a gentle hug. He sighed, trying to hold back his tears ad he hugged his arms around her waist.

"I'm all right, don't worry. I just had an odd dream." He murmured into her strawberry scented hair. She nodded and pulled away.

"I think we both needed a hug." She said, going back to her cooking.

"Saa…why aren't you guys in school?" Jounouchi asked.

"Winter vacation. We get it a week before everyone else." Hikari informed. Jounouchi nodded and looked around.

"Where's Saka-chan?" he asked.

"She's out on an interview. Trying to find a job." She said.

"Oh. Do you work?"

"Yes, my job is simple. I have leverage so I can go in whenever I want. Plus my boss loves me so she lets me do just about anything I want. Besides, as long as I get my story in on time, there's really no problem." She said. Jounouchi nodded, a bit confused. "I work for a newspaper. I have a column all to myself!" she said happily. Jounouchi smiled.

"That's cool. You like to write?" he asked. She nodded. "Yeah, I do too…But I'm really more of an artist. I draw." He said. Hikari smiles.

"My sister is an artist. She drew the manga Kokoro Yuki. I wrote the story line though. She has it an its recently up to volume five. I've finished the storyline, but she hasn't finished drawing it yet. She hates reading so it takes her a while to read through my script." Hikari said as if it were the most common thing in the world. Jounouchi's eyes widened and he went slack-jawed.

"She drew that?! Th-That was my favorite manga a couple years ago! I even own the first three volumes!" Jounouchi said happily. Hikari smiled.

"Yea, I think they dubbed it horribly, but…the Japanese Kokoro Yuki is a bit more difficult to understand. I like the version Snow Heart better for children anyways." Jounouchi nodded.

"Yeah, I like the angst it implies. Along with it being yaoi, yuri and normal romances." Jounouchi said. Hikari nodded.

"Yes. Originally, the tow boys that are friends with Yuki and Ai, Sora and Motoki, they were based after Yuki and Shuichi of Gravitation." Hikari said, shrugging.

"Gravitation?! Another one of my favorites!" Jounouchi said with a broad smile. "Shuichi's pretty cute, isn't he?" Hikari nodded.

"Yeah, way cute!" she paused. "You said you draw?" Jounouchi nodded and Hikari blushed a little.

"Couldn't I see some of them?"

"I…" Jounouchi stuttered. He'd never shown any of his artwork with anyone… "I suppose so…"

When Jounouchi returned with the sketchbook, he handed it to Hikari. She looked up at him then opened the front cover.

"Oh…" she said, recognizing the first subject. It was a picture of Ryou. The boy was resting his chin on his hand, looking out a window with a dreamy half-asleep look. His snowy hair framed his face.

"It's beautiful!" she said quietly. She turned the page, another one of Ryou, but a fun-loving one. Ryou was laughing, leaning back and supporting his hands behind his head. His eyes were sparkling with happiness. The next few pages were of Ryou in various poses and moods. Very suddenly, the Ryou series ended with what seemed like a self portrait, a very disappointed looking Jounouchi, who seemed to be sitting on a bridge railing, suspended above a clam river. Not like he planned on jumping, but like he needed somewhere to be where he could be by himself. Many of the pictures thereafter consisted of Seto Kaiba, usually leaning against a door of some kind with a scowl on his face…but every once in a few pages, there would be a picture with him smiling very softly…almost as if he wasn't…but you just knew he was.

"These are amazing." Hikari said. "Saka-chan would love to see them…Maybe we can show her when she gets back, if that's okay." Jounouchi nodded to show that he agreed.

"Damn it!" Hikari said, smiling. "Why do all Japanese people have to be such good artist?!" She screamed, frustrated. Jounouchi laughed as the front door opened.

"Mm! I smell French toast! Fork 'um over Kari!" Saka screamed. Hikari smiled and began to dish out the plates. She handed Sakari the sketchbook.

"Here, check these out. The boy with long hair is Ryou." Hikari said. She opened the book.

"Oh…Ryou Bakura? He's a cutie…" she said. "Who drew these?" Jounouchi blushed.

"I did." He murmured. Her eyes widened.

"Wow! These are great! He…whoa…is that…Kaiba Seto? Daamn…!" she said. Jounouchi blushed again.

"I was fascinated by him…some of those pictured are form before he left and some are from after…" Saka and Hikari nodded.

"Well," Hikari handed him a plate. "Eat up. You have to have a full balanced meal in order to be healthy! The orange juice is in the fridge." She said.

"Thanks mom, but this isn't a very healthy meal, Should I spank you now?" Jounouchi asked, slapping Hikari's behind as she walked by. She squeaked and blushed to her hairline. Jounouchi grinned and Saka choked on her toast.

"I told you guys, if you wanna have your thing, you gotta tell me!" she complained. Jounouchi grinned farther and raised his eyebrow.

"Oh? You want some of this?" he asked, referring to how he hit Kari's ass. Saka blushed and shook her head. "You sure?" he asked, moving in on her. She gulped and blushed farther. Kari grinned.

"Oh yeah! She wants it! Chase her around the room, Jou!"

"Should I?" he asked with a crooked grin. Sakari shook her heard ferociously.

"No!"

"Then spank her too. She's been bad."

"You wouldn't dare." Saka challenged.

"Would I?" Jounouchi asked, a certain glint in his eyes. Sakari dropped everything and bolted out of the room, Jounouchi hot on her trail.

"EEEEEEEEEYAA!!" she screeched, running down the hall before coming to a dead end. "Oh shit…" Jounouchi caught up with her and grabbed her around the waist with one arm, raising the other.

"NOO!!"

WHACK!

Hikari giggled at Sakari's face completely beet red. Jounouchi hugged her and she hugged him back, still a dark shade of crimson. He let go and tousled her hair. She grinned after a bit.

"Well…that was an interesting way to start the morning."

Jounouchi chuckled as they walked back into the kitchen to eat. When they were done, Jounouchi felt very sick. His thin body couldn't take it…his stomach had grown smaller over the years of starvation, no matter how he used to eat. It was part of his routine, he just couldn't shake it off that easily right away…

"Hikari…Sakari…I…I don't think…I mean…I'm…sick." He said, looking away. Hikari's eyes darkened.

"You're going to be sick for while. Don't worry. I used to have a friend who did what you did. It's okay if you can't keep it in, just don't force yourself to get rid of it. It's harder knowing you can't do it, isn't it?" she asked. He nodded solemnly. "Its okay not to kept it down, let it go naturally. It's only bad when you force your body to endure that sort of pain." She said. Jounouchi took in a deep breath, calming himself. He nodded.

"You had a friend who used to do this?"

"Yes. A personal friend." She said, winking at him. Jounouchi's eyes widened. It was no wonder she was so sensitive. "I'm doing the laundry now, you wanna give me your dirty clothes? I'll leave them cottony fresh! Nice whity tighties!" she said, grinning. Jounouchi grinned and poked her stomach.

"I wear boxers."

"Good. All men should wear boxers. It's not right otherwise…" she said. They both laughed. Jounouchi walked into his room to get his clothes. He picked them up and turned to go back.

"SAKA! GET YUR DIRTY CLOTHES!" he heard Hikari yell. He laughed lightly as he came back into the living room.

"Oh…oops, sorry Jou, I guess I forgot to give you a laundry basket…" she said, eyeing Jounouchi's arms full of clothes. "Here, put them in here."

"Arigatou."

"You wanna give me a hand?"

"With the laundry? Are you kidding?" he asked. "Well…I suppose I could help…" he said after receiving a glare from the brunette haired girl.

"C'mon, even men can go laundry. Did you have your mommy do it back home?" she asked tauntingly.

"No I did my own. I just don't like…ugh…folding…"

"Yeah, that's the worst part, I will admit." Hikari murmured.

"Oh well! At least I'm doing it with a friend!" Sakari fell out from behind a corner.

"EXCUSE ME?!?" her face was red and her eyes were wide. Jounouchi and Hikari looked confused for a second before they figured out what she must have heard and how it sounded. Hikari turned red and waved her hands back and forth in front of her face.

"LAUNDRY! LAUNDRY! ONLY THE LAUNDRY!" she screamed and Jou pointed to the baskets. Sakari sighed in relief. Just the relieved look on her face was enough to make Jou and Hikari giggle.

"Jeez! Be more specific next time!" Saka said, dropping her laundry basket at Hikari's feet. "I thought I'd have a heart attack!"

"Gomen!" Jounouchi replied, still laughing.

"It's okay, it's just a good thing you meant the laundry!" Hikari giggled.

"C'mon, Jou, let's go 'do it'!"

Sakari rolled her eyes and went to start her time on the computer. Hikari had forgotten to take their ad for a roommate off the Internet so they were still getting twenty to thirty perverted e-mails a day.

Delete, delete, delete, del—hey, what's this? She saw an e-mail labeled "That looks like Mutou Yuugi from…" the e-mail went on and on about how he was lonely and that his best friend ditched him. "WHAT?! _He_ ditched _Jou_! Kari! Jounouchi! Come look at this!"

When Hikari and Jounouchi had read through the letter, Jounouchi had gotten slightly upset.

"I can't believe it! That son of a bitch! How could he!?"

"Looking for attention…" Hikari said. "Using pity factors to get friends." Sakari nodded in agreement.

"Backstabbing…I _can't_ believe…says _I_…" Jounouchi muttered continuously under his breath.

"Fuck," Hikari murmured, and Sakari's eyes widened, Hikari hardly ever said that word. Hikari set her hand on Jounouchi's shoulder. "C'mon, Jou, lets get back to the laundry."

"Right."

OoOJounouchi's POVOoO

Is my life screwed up or what?! I don't believe Yuugi would ever sink that low…He was always…so nice and selfless…I shouldn't waste my time thinking about him…He isn't worth it.

We finished the laundry rather quickly. Hikari sure is a nice person…She and Ryou would have been a great couple…But Ryou always said, opposites attract…I guess he was talking about a yamixhikari relationship and Kaiba's and mine…I'll be damned if everybody didn't know I m in love with Kaiba Seto.

Yeah. I finally figured out that emotion. Why I was so hung up about him…why he haunts my dreams…I suppose it was love all along. And…I just didn't realize it…

Ah god…I need to go cut myself… 

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Xiaolang's Ying Fa: So, stay tuned for the next chapter. Thanks!


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